Why Privilege Matters
We had a pretty good dialogue about community agreements last training, but I want you all to think to yourselves right now: why do we have community agreements like that? Why should we agree on things like trying to understand everyone comes from a different place of knowledge on certain topics? Or why should we agree to take space, but also make space especially during times when someone may be better able to speak on a certain topic?
I want to start off this highlight by disclaiming that I am no expert on the complexities of social dynamics and oppression. I am in no way the most appropriate person to speak on some of the issues this mentor training will address, but I am here to get y'all thinking about some basic definitions and how it applies to you as a mentor and the interactions you will have with a diverse community of people. The following words are not meant to teach you what to think, but rather get you thinking. And, if you disagree or think there should be more to be added to this dialogue, please go ahead and do so in your discussion posts and responses as well in your BTI groups!
Things like privilege and oppression are very political and sensitive topics, and I hope that all of us are able to listen to understand instead of respond this coming training. Please remember that if we genuinely care about educating others on issues like this, we should be correcting with care instead of shaming ignorance. If you are well-versed in topics like this, please remember this is an educational experience for many and we should make space for them to articulate their opinions and thoughts.
We all experience the world differently because of who we are, and inevitably, because of the privilege (or lack of) associated with our identities. First off, I want to state that identity is fluid and and the several ways you identify overlap. You are not the same person you will be in a few years and your life will be affected by the different aspects of your identity simultaneously. For example, in the movie Hidden Figures (2016), the main characters are put at a significant disadvantage when pursuing STEM careers not only because they are womxn*, but because they are black womxn from low-income backgrounds before the Civil Rights Act in the United States. In this context, these womxn are put at a disadvantage because of several parts of their identity. This is called intersectionality, which is a concept used to address how different parts of ourselves come together and shape the way we experience our world in unique ways. *the term "womxn" is a way to make language more inclusive, avoiding the usage of male-centric gendered language that implies womxn are an extension of men
Second, we must recognize that privilege is relative to the culture, environment, and world one lives in. Privilege by definition is a socially constructed advantage associated, not “earned” or “given,” with certain groups of individuals just because of how they are identified. When we think of identity we think of what makes us who we are, but when we think of privilege we must think about who we are in relation to others and the context we live in. I want you to think about what makes privilege. A big part of understanding privilege is understanding the difference between equality and equity.
Some of you may have seen the image above that shows a difference between equality and equity. Equity is not simply giving underprivileged people more so that everyone is equal — it is providing the means to those who are underprivileged in our society so that they have the same abilities and opportunities to become equal. It's justice. In the case of the image above, justice is replacing the wooden fence with the chainlink fence that allows everyone to participate without any additional help. We could all be born into the same community, but we need to recognize that we are not always born equal in the society we exist in. Because of who we are as individuals, we may or may not have an advantage over others.
The difficult part about privilege is that sometimes it’s hard to recognize it, especially if we are the ones who have it. For example, some people choose not to participate in politics because it's too "controversial" or too "heated" for them. In this case, the privilege is easily being able to remove one's self from the emotionally exhausting political conversation. Some people inevitably do not have to fight for certain rights for themselves because government policy or social norms do not infringe on any of their basic human rights. To some, this is kind of an “out of sight, out of mind” situation; if it’s not a problem for them, it just doesn’t exist. If you don’t even think about a problem, let alone see it, how can you even recognize it as a problem? This is what makes recognizing privilege so difficult to understand.
Sometimes though, recognizing privilege is not always so complex. Privilege can come in the form of something small and simple. Back during my first year, I was accepted onto UCI Orientation Staff. I remember walking into the first training and everyone’s name buttons were placed in little circles so we could meet new people. After a few minutes of searching, I spotted a little green button that read my name and right under, it read “He, Him, His.” This denotation of my preferred pronouns was strange to me. I look like a “he,” people think I’m a “him,” people say my identity is “his.” So why did we have to include that on my name button? I looked around at other buttons.
“She, Her, Hers”
“They, Them, Theirs”
I began to realize that not everyone identifies with the gender they appear to be or were assigned at birth. I started to remember how there are people who don’t identify as a “he” or as a “her” and that there’s a whole spectrum of non-binary gender* identities that some people don’t know about or refuse to acknowledge. *non-binary gender: gender that does not pertain to the two traditional genders, male and female.
And that’s when I recognized I have privilege in a way I never even thought about. I have the privilege of looking a certain way, identifying a certain way, and having others acknowledge that properly. I have the privilege of not being misgendered constantly, which allows me certain abilities, such as using a public restroom safely. A privilege can be something so simple as being identified the way you actually identify. In that moment, I realized I had cisgender* privilege. And for some folks, that’s not the case. *cisgender: denotes or relates to a person whose personal gender identity corresponds with their gender assigned at birth.
I want y’all to think of the impact the lack of privilege can have on underprivileged individuals. This isn’t my own analogy, it’s from a well-worded response to an anonymous question I saw online.
Anonymous asked:
“Towards the whole ‘pronouns hurt people’s feelings’ topic. Am I REALLY the only person on the planet that thinks people are becoming far too sensitive? Nearly to the point that they shouldn’t leave their little home bubbles in the case that a bird chirps next to them in a way that sounds like a mean word. Maybe, JUST MAYBE, we’re becoming a little TOO coddling and people need to learn to deal with simplistic shit like words. And yes, I’ve been insulted and made fun of. I got over it. So can you.”
They responded:
“Supposedly invented by the Chinese, there is an ancient form of torture that is nothing more than cold, tiny drops falling upon a person’s forehead. On its own, a single drop is nothing. It falls upon the brow making a tiny splash. It doesn’t hurt. No real harm comes from it.
In multitudes, the drops are still fairly harmless. Other than a damp forehead, there really is no cause for concern. The key to the torture is being restrained. You cannot move. You must feel each drop. You have lost all control over stopping these drops of water from splashing on your forehead.
It still doesn’t seem like that big of a deal. But person after person, time and time again—would completely unravel psychologically. They all had a breaking point where each drop turned into a horror. Building and building until all sense of sanity was completely lost.
‘It was just a joke, quit being so sensitive.’
‘They used the wrong gender pronoun, big deal.’
‘So your parents don’t understand, it could be worse.’
Day after day. Drop after drop. It builds up. A single instance on its own is no big deal. A few drops, not a problem. But when you are restrained, when you cannot escape the drops, when it is unending—these drops can be agony.
People aren’t sensitive because they can’t take a joke. Because they can’t take being misgendered one time. Because they lack a thick skin.
People are sensitive because the drops are unending and they have no escape from them.
You are only seeing the tiny, harmless, single drop hitting these so-called “sensitive” people. You are failing to see the thousands of drops endured before that. You are failing to see the restraints that make them inescapable.”
If you have privilege, you have the power to give the attention and means for underprivileged people to achieve justice. One of the first keys to change is recognizing there is a problem. As stated earlier, when you have privilege, you may not experience some problems that those without privilege do, and thus, you may not even realize there is a problem at all.
It is important to be aware of your own identity and those of others, because when you are able to sympathize or empathize with the people around you, you are able to see the privileges you have or don’t have and the privileges others have or don’t have. Recognizing your own privilege is key to helping those who do not have the same opportunities. In order to take steps towards true equity, it’s important to consciously and actively help others who may not have the same abilities and opportunities as you.
When you address a source of privilege and recognize there is a problem, that is an act of leadership. Remember, a good leader is one who recognizes a problem and acts to solve it. In AMP, we as mentors are going to be role models and supporters of people whose stories we cannot ever fully understand. We need to recognize how to navigate certain conversations or how to de-escalate emotionally and politically charged discussions. The point of this training and introducing you to these topics is not to tell you how to think or make AMP all about social justice -- it is to ensure you are all well aware of the kinds of interactions and conversations you'll be having, and how to be a mentor who empowers others in this space. We are a program for first-generation low-income students who may or may not have lived a way of life severely impacted by their disadvantages, and we need all of you to be the best prepared allies you can be.
